Monday, September 9, 2013

HOW I SPENT MY SUMMER

DEAR DIARY,
FIRST , IM SORRY IVE BEEN AWAY FOR SO LONG
BUT LATELY ITS BEEN ONE BS SITUATION AFTER ANOTHER
YOU UNDERSTAND IM SURE
THIS SUMMER I WENT TO SCHOOL AND TRIED TO MAKE MONEY
IT SEEMED IMPOSSIBLE TO CATCH UP SOME HOW
I READ ALOT , AND THAT WAS GREAT
MAN THOSE BOOKS REALLY HELPED, BECAUSE I THINK I WAS IN NEED OF A MENTAL/ EMOTIONAL VACATION FOR A WHILE, BOOKS CAN HELP YA GET AWAY FROM YOUR SELF FOR A WHILE
I DONT KNOW HOW I GOT THROUGH ALL THOSE BOOKS. I CAN BARELY READ
I WONDER IF OTHER PEOPLE NOTICE THIS, THEY MUST WHEN THEY HEAR ME SPEAK
HONESTLY, THIS HAS BEEN A SOLITARY SUMMER , FUCK IT
ITS BEEN MISERABLY LONELY
YOU KNOW EVEN IF I SIT AND TALK TO SOMEONE I STILL FEEL LONELY ,SOMETIMES.
I THINK WHAT I REALLY CRAVE IS THE INTIMATE MOMENTS THAT HAPPEN IN CONVERSATION WHEN IM SO DEEPLY ENGAGED WITH SOMEONES WORDS AND INFLECTION OR LIKE THE WAY A JAW MOVES AROUND TO MAKE WORDS COME OUT
THOSE TINY PIECES OF TIME ARE INTIMATE MORE INTIMATE FOR ME THEN ANYTHING ELSE
I LOVE TO JUST SPY AND WATCH EYE LASHES FLICKER OR WATCH THE GLAZE THAT OCCURS IN THE EYES WHEN SOMETHING OF GREIF IS MENTIONED
OH WHAT I ENJOY SO MUCH IS TO SIT AND PET A FREND TENDERLY WITH WORDS
LIKE TELL THEM HOW PERFECT I THINK THE SHAPE OF THEIR TOES ARE
OR HOW THE CLEAR GREEN OF THEIR EYES IS MOST BEAUTIFUL THING IVE SEEN ALL WEEK
WHEN I WALKED INTO YOUR BACK YARD YOU WELCOMED ME IN LIKE I WAS A  BIRTHDAY PRINCESS GIRL AND I ALMOST CRIED.
I WANT TO BE SO CLOSE IM GOING CRAZY BUT MAYBE YOU'LL UNDERSTAND DIARY THAT IM NOT TRYING TO HAVE YOU PITY ME
THIS IS NOT A COMPLAINT
IM JUST SAYING DAMMIT I WANT SO MUCH OF IT LIKE ALOT ALOT I WILL DRINK IT ALL UP IM SO THIRSTY FOR IT MY
THERS NOT ENOUGH OUT THERE OR THERE IS AND I JUST GOTTA CHANGE MY PERSPECTIVE OR
IT'S ALL AROUND ME AND IM THE ONE WHO DOESN'T GOT THE TIME OR A DAY TO JUST BE CLOSE 
MY BIRTHDAY IS COMING UP AND I WOULD LOVE TO
GIVE SOME HUGS AND KISSES TO ALL MY FRIENDS 







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